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I Thought I Had This....

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ImScared

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I did something stupid on Sunday night and I can't let it go.....suddenly life is crazy and I feel like I'm losing my mind. I thought things were getting better. I went on holiday with my German. We had an amazing time. He went home to his girlfriend. I've discovered that I have a tendency to act out if he posts something about her and it upsets me. Sunday, on a certain site, I met a guy. He seemed so nice texting. He wasn't bad but I got a bad feeling when I met him. Let's say that things didn't go well. I had issues and it was my fault. Since then, I cry every night to sleep and every morning when I wake up. Thank goodness for my German. I asked him to be there for me as a friend and he has. He is trying to help me but he's in Germany. He is upset because every time he sees me on Skype, I'm crying my eyes out. I hadn't heard from the guy until tonight. He wanted to meet up but I was able to beg off but I'm sick to my stomach! What is wrong with me?! I can't do this anymore.....I don't know what to do.....

Thanks for listening to me rant, I'm sorry

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Oh no I am so sorry for your pain. :( Don't apologize for saying you're feelings ever, because they are important. This is a hard time. Love yourself. Write as much as you need. Sending love

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Thank you....I've managed to beg off several times that he has texted me. My German is mad at the guy and told me that I'm not to be alone with him again. It's nice to know that someone cares....or at least pretends to care. I'm feeling a little bit better.

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Thank you....I'm doing much better and have practiced on not acting out and getting myself under control.

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