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About this blog

just so you know youll probably see a few triggering things in here. anyways, this is just gonna be something for me to put my thoughts in about whatever and how im going with healing from my sexual abuse

Entries in this blog


a few years ago dillan, my alter thats kind of like my own personal therapist, asked what was stopping me from telling others about "it". so far these are the reasons that i can name off the top of my head (if theyre crossed out then theyve been taken care of):

fear of being judged/made fun of/etc

fear of losing close friends

fear of making things awkward

i was just trying to forget about it, so not talking about it would help me forget about it

fear that i would dissociate in front of someone while talking about it

feeling guilty when talking about it

dillan has helped me kind of control when i dissociate and has also helped me learn that just keeping it to myself is not good and wont help me forget at all. we are still working on the other 4, so hopefully sometime soon i wont be afraid of those things anymore.


just to start off

im gonna be doin this thing now.


if anything might be triggering i will put a trigger warning and what the trigger/triggers are. if i dont put a trigger warning please tell me and ill get to fixing it asap!!

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