so most people will say im crazy for even thinking or believing this but, ive died four times...in my dreams. so i believe that when we dream we experience things outisde this world we live in with other souls. i believe this is why we can recognize someone in reality and not know where you saw them before. so, the first two dreams ive had was years ago but i remember them like it happened two minutes ago. i was standing up to this bully, some guy, and i remember being shot in the chest. i remember feeling the burning sensation, feeling my blood leave my body, feeling my life come to an end as my breathing slowed down. there was no white light, no flashbacks on my life, no moments of regret, no confessionals of undying love. just silence. a stillness, no voices in my head, just stillness. the third time i was in a stadium, the earth was coming to an end. im surrounded with hundreds of people trying to escape this tsunami but the stadium starts to fill with water anyway. there is this preacher trying to calm everyone, helping them ease into the death. my birth family is there (B, my aunt, uncle, cousin and her 3 kids) then everyone panics and tries to run again knowing there is no escape but try anyway. they try to convince me to leave but i stay as well as my uncle. we sit on the steps listening and watching people run as the water rises. then it reaches me and i feel myself holding my breathe then letting go. i feel the water enter my lungs, i feel it all over my body and in my ears, then i take on last deep breathe and stillness. i feel that my heart has stopped beating, i feel my body begin to float a little but its quiet, no voices, a calm settles over me.
after each dream i wake up slowly and feel at least for those few minutes a sense of peace i can never describe. its like a chance at being born again of something. im not a religious person by any means nor am i deeply spiritual but i do believe in living multiple lives and i feel like thats what ive experienced. i believe we die only to come back and try life again. most will probably chalk it up to heartburn while im sleeping or whatever but its indescribable the feeling of dying. i dont know when i will ever experience it again but, i will always remember those dreams. i will take from them every thing i will ever need to learn about life.