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About this blog

recovering from csa and the struggle of accepting it and coping with the aftermath

Entries in this blog

therapy today

After walking in the freezing cold, wearing a panda hat, i made it to therapy, cold but proud i made it there after last night, Last night things got super dark, i let my daughter sleep over on a school night so i could be alone, but honestly i lost my courage and i told my t that and i expected some help, maybe some rational thoughts to replace the irrational ones that are there since mom's passing last week, but instead we discussed why i didnt, which is my three cats, my daughter, my h



the forest

Tonight, once again i visited the forest, the same forest i have been running through since 11, since the day i ran out of the forest into a pick up truck. Every few years, i find myself back in my mind in my dark heart, running towards my escape, that pick up truck that was supposed to end my abuse, end his terror over me but instead i am still here. The one thing i want to conquer in therapy is my desire to keep running towards that truck, the desire to end his now haunting terror in



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