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Moving Forward (easier said than done)

Entries in this blog

Constantly Frighting

I was able to control my flashbacks and fears by being logical by keep telling myself that I am safe, fear is not real. But, sometimes it just gets so overwhelming and I tend to break down and about to get that dark place I do not want to be at. I am still fighting hard. I keep telling myself that I am in control and not my perpetrator. I think of it as every second I give in to flashbacks, triggers, and fears, I am making my perpetrator happy and having him have control of my life. That gi

FindingClosure

FindingClosure

Old Habits

I have some old habit I am not proud of mentioning. I have developed it about at the same time as flashbacks and triggers started (Flashbacks and Triggers started earlier but this is when I started be aware of them.) to happen in my late teens. This old habit happens to be a trigger as well, so it really makes me not want to do it but sometimes I can't stop doing it because I am addicted to it. I have been very good about it, but I fell off the wagon again. I will keep battling this by using

FindingClosure

FindingClosure

Fighting Back

I have been fighting hard. It seems the more I fight back, it comes back at me stronger. It is a struggle to regain myself in how to process my fears and telling myself to come back to the reality. The reality is that I know who I am and my fears stemming from my triggers, flashbacks, nightmares are all in my head. They are just in my head and imprisoning me. Fear is not real. It is not something you can touch or smell. Therefore it does not exist. What does not exist can not hurt me. I

FindingClosure

FindingClosure

Feeling Better

I am feeling much better today. Thanks to this website, I was able to let things out and read helpful responds from my post. A lot of things I have already have known in process of healing, but now I feel like I can really practice them in my life. My problem is very much fear driven like others. I knew this before, but I truthfully realized now that fear is not real. What is not real can not hurt me. I will not live and controlled by fear. I think if I can control my fear, then my triggers

FindingClosure

FindingClosure

Everyday Is A Struggle

I have read a lot of self healing materials and they really help me in understanding what my problems are. I know what I am dealing with and I know what to do, but it is so hard to follow with them. Things I most struggle with are flashbacks and triggers. They are getting worse as I get older. I guess because I have suppressed it for so long and so deep inside of me that I guess my mind finally has nowhere to keep everything in. I am wondering what kind of day I am going to have today. I am

FindingClosure

FindingClosure

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