I can't say that i'm very much in touch with mine, because the thought of her is sometimes so overhwelming, that i just simply shut down. However, i've gotten to a point where i can't deny that she exists anymore. The first time i "made contact" was in therapy, i kept telling my t that i just didn't get this whole inner child thing. So we did the empty chair exercise. My t got up from her chair, made me close my eyes and started asking me to imagine myself when i was little. For some reason, this image of myself on my 7th birthday came up. She asked me to describe everything about how i looked then. Then she asked me to talk to that little girl, and tell her the things that nobody has ever told me, like i was not to blame for what happend; and i pretty much lost it. I could see for the first time how little i was, and still am in many ways. That helped me forgive myself in many ways, because when you see that little girl "from the outside," you can't blame her anymore. You wouldn't do that to a 7 year old in the street, would you?
I think i haven't been that much in touch with her since then, because it can get so overwhelming. But i know she's there, and now i've decided to give her a name. I'm not sure where our relationship is going, but i know this is a step in the right direction. The important thing is to give ourselves time, and when we are ready, we'll know it.
Hope this helped...although i don't know that i made any sense
you can pm me if you'd like to talk more about this, i don't wanna hijack Ruthiegirl's thread.